On wellbeing and welldoing
If I ask you to list things that are in service of your wellbeing, what would they be?
Some obvious ones spring to mind: exercise, walking the dog, having dinner with family, listening to your favourite music, treating yourself to a spa day, taking a vacation, reading a book, praying, volunteering, baking a cake, eating that cake… we could go on.
Did you notice though that all of the things we listed involve us “doing” something?
While many things that we “do” will serve our well-being. However, many “doing” practices are often in service of fixing something in our lives.
We exercise because we want to fix our bodies
We take that spa day because we need to fix our exhaustion
We spend time with a loved one to fix a breakdown in relationship
We read that book to fix a gap in our knowledge.
Often practices that have us “do” something serve as fixes in our lives for something else. When our wellbeing practices are designed as a fix, are they really truly in service of our well-being at all? Or are they in service of patching over something and kicking a truth down the road:
We “fix” our body instead of seeing our selves as beautiful as we are
We “fix” the exhaustion instead of fundamentally addressing our priorities and how we use our energy over time
We “fix” a relationship with a fun night out instead of practicing openness and true vulnerability with one another
We “fix” that gap in our knowledge instead of accepting that we are already enough.
I assert that to truly serve our well-being, we need a blend of “doing” and “being” practices. And we need to notice when going for a “fix” doesn’t serve our wellbeing at all - at least not in a lasting way.
Here, then, are twenty ideas for well-being practices and twenty ideas for welldoing practices. Of course there are a great many more that you could take on, so add your own. I aim to practice 10 of these every day, blended from each list. As a perfectionist-type personality, it serves my wellbeing is also to be at ease with not “scoring” 10 out of 10 on these practices every day. So one of mine is also not to strive for perfection in wellbeing.
What will yours be?
Wellbeing suggestions
Sit in silence (see my post on the importance of nothingness)
Meditate (this can be a bridge from the world of doing to being and allows you to explore the connection between them - they’re not separate and distinct)
Be in gratitude to yourself
Be in gratitude to others
Notice and accept what is
Be self-love
Be compassion
Be whole-hearted
See the “now” as all there is (future and past are only stories and extrapolations)
Be in touch with your breath
Listen to and feel your inner body
Feel the separation between your body and the world around you
Be with your emotions, whatever they may be in the present
Acknowledge and accept your beauty
Daydream
Doodle without intent (the important thing here is the “without intent” part, otherwise it’s a well-doing practice - not that there’s anything wrong with that too)
Forgive
Silence your inner critic
Stop assigning meaning and judgement from what others say and do to and of you
Don’t react.
Welldoing suggestions
Exercise
Read a book
Cook and eat something nourishing and delicious
Play with a child or a friend
Enjoy a spa treatment
Practice a skincare routine
Brush your teeth mindfully
Get an early night
Have a lay-in
Listen to your favourite music, or discover something new
Go for a hike in the forest, on the beach or up a hill
Call a relative or a friend
Ask for help
Pray
Volunteer in your community
Draw, paint, make, knit, bake… just create something
Have sex
Clean a room or have a clear-out
Watch a movie
Have a leisurely brunch with a friend.
In my approach to coaching, serving your wellbeing is core to making lasting, once-and-for-all changes in your life. Having a coach creates a support structure and accountability for you as you also then explore your dreams and develop projects to create your future. Work with me as your coach and have me stand for you, your wellbeing and living your best life. Sign-up for a free trial coaching session today.